I'm kindeve a reading dork.  I've always read.  I can't remember learning how to read but some of the first books I remember enjoying are simple ones.  One of the first books I remember LOVING was "Are You My Mother?"  It's about a little chicken that wanders around asking animals, "Are you my mother?"  I also remember really enjoying "Perfect the Pig."  We had a lot of books at home, some of them I have taken and added to the library of my children.  I read a lot and as I got older, I remember loving "Where the Red Fern Grows" (I totally cried my eyes out, every time I read it) and "Anne of Green Gables" (I love that her dad got her a dress with "puffed" sleeves even though Marilla told him not to.)  I read every Baby Sitter's Club book from #1 - 100something.  I had them all nicely lined up on my pretty white bookshelf.  Each one of them was stamped with my personalized stamp.  Later, we sold them in a garage sale to the mother of a would be friend during high school.  The first adult book I read was Jurassic Park, read in the 7th grade.  My dad told me I would like it - and I loved it.  (I also predicted that it would be made into a movie.)  I went through author phases - Dean Koontz, Robin Cook, Michael Crichton, John Irving, and even RL Stine.

So it goes without saying that one of my most favoritest gifts ever is the Nook my parents got me for COLLEGE GRADUATION!  (That's right, I am a graduate.  I have a diploma.  Suck it Mark!  I did graduate, it just took me a long time!) I am constantly singing it's praises.  I love that I can whip it out on the beach (yes, I did that!) and I don't have to worry about the pages flying around in the wind. I can also have my choice of thousands of books with me - and not be weighed down by a heavy backpack trying to hold them all.

Also, I love that you can "accessorize" it!  (Mention that outside of my blog and I will deny saying it.  It makes me seem a bit ridiculous.)  Kate Spade makes cases for it - awesome ones.  AND you can replace the dull gray back with snazzy colors like lime green - which happens to perfectly match my lime green and turquoise Kate Spade case. It says "once upon a time on the front" and "happily ever after" on the back - I love that!  Every girl is a fairytale princess - age doesn't take that away.

Anyway, I love the Nook.  It's fabulous.  It's easy to use.  It has nice lines.  It's light weight, even though it currently holds 25+ books.

The only thing that sucks about the Nook is the Lend Me feature.  Being able to loan books is kindeve a big selling point for Barnes and Noble.  How cool is that!?  Some of the books I buy can be loaned to a friend for 14 days.  Pretty cool.  What sucks is that it doesn't work easily.  Not as easily as they advertise on their webpage.  I have successfully loaned ONE book to Holly.  She tried to loan me a book and it led to one of the most infuriating telephone conversations I've ever had.

First, let me brief you on a few things.

1. I spent something like FOUR years working telephone customer service in one of the shittiest departments for customer service.  Billing.  I said it then, and I still say it now - no one calls the billing department to thank them for the monthly billing.  Every call was someone bitching.  I am still amazed at the idiots that would call in pissed because the $21.95 AOL charge had been showing up on their credit card statement for 2 years and they just noticed it.  Anyway, I'm good with people and I'm nice on the phone (it's easier for me to pass judgement when you can't see my eyes rolling out of my head!)  The time I spent working customer service has given me lifelong respect for anyone in customer service - and that isn't just people on the phone.  It extends to waiters, cashiers, etc.  I am ALWAYS extra nice because I know how awful it is to be on the other side.
2. I am the Queen of Passive-Agressiveness.  Just ask Bill.  :)  I don't fight.  I will avoid confrontation like it's the plague.  And if I do get backed into a corner and a fight ensues, it is guaranteed that I will lock up and not say anything.  It's a defense mechanism - I've always been like that.  I assume that if I don't say anything, you will eventually run out of things to yell about. 

Monday I called Barnes and Noble for Nook support - problems with the Lend me feature.  I only had two problems and they seem pretty simple.  I sent Holly a loan request for a book and she never received it.  I couldn't resend the request because it was showing as "on loan" in my library.  And she sent me a request, I was able to receive it and accept it into my ebook library but I couldn't get it to download to my Nook.  I tried for 30 minutes Sunday night and for a few minutes prior to placing the call.

The Barnes and Noble Tech-Support Asshole (BNTSA) wasted 45 minutes trying to tell me that I wasn't able to download the book to my Nook because my shipping address was wrong, I didn't have valid credit card information saved in my profile, I wasn't getting a wifi connection, I wasn't getting a 3g connection, and finally that my device wasn't registered correctly.  He didn't listen to me when I told him NONE of these things were the problem because I was able to purchase and download a book as recently as last week.  So he suggested unregistering and registering.  This immediately prompted me to ask, "Am I going to lose any of the data on my Nook?"  He said no, everything would still be there.  So I went through more of his procedure to unregister and reregister my Nook.  And guess what! 

It deleted EVERYTHING.

This is when I started to get a little bit irritated.  It was obvious the guy had no idea how to troubleshoot my problem.  He was grasping straws and I told him as much as I expressed my unhappiness about losing all of my books.  When I tried to retrieve my library, I continued to get the same error message that I received when I tried to download the loaned book.  He told me it must be a system error and that I should call back in two hours.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?  

I told him that was completely unacceptable.  I spent 45 minutes on the phone with him, he deleted everything, couldn't recover it, and I needed to call back in two hours because his incompetent BNTSA ass couldn't fix my two original problems and now my third (and much more important) problem.  He continued to tell me I needed to call back, I continued to tell him that was unacceptable.  He said that he had gone through all of the procedures that his manager told him to try.  So I asked to speak with this manager.  He said the manager wasn't available.  I said I would gladly wait.  He said I couldn't.  So I asked if there was someone else that I could speak with that could address the problem.  He said no.  This is when he started to tell me that I needed to "calm down" and that he wasn't going to put me on the phone with anyone if I was "irate."

This is where I started to get irate. 

(Reference #1 above.)  I don't get mad with reps.  It's a shitty job and they are just reading scripts and doing what they are told.  I was by no means out of control, raising my voice, or even irate. I'm just not that person that yells.  I most definately don't yell at people over the phone.  I don't say mean things because what's the point?  BNTSA just accused me of being two things that are sooooo not true!!  That infuriated me - so I turned on my extra sweet condescending voice and calmly explained to the BNTSA that it was unacceptable for him to tell me to call back after he deleted everything and was unable to recover.  He replied that I needed to calm down or he was going to flag me in the system as a "customer unwilling to follow procedure."  WTF!  It was his bullshit procedure that led me to the problem.  He wanted me to call back because he was trying to cover up his inability to help me by calling it a "system problem."  Sorry dude, I've been there and played those games with customers.  It's not going to work on me.

I resolved the problem by hanging up on him. 

I realize that was a very immature thing to do but I couldn't keep having that discussion with him.  It's not my fault he was incompetent!  All I wanted was someone that was competent and could fix my problem.  That doesn't seem like too much to ask of a "tech support" department.  I called back and spent 25 minutes on the phone with a nice girl.  We didn't resolve any of my three problems but I had to go.  The kids were getting restless and I couldn't stay on the phone any longer.  She suggested that I bring it into a store for assistance.  I had planned to do it this weekend but miraculously my library showed back up tonight.  I have probably tried 15 times since I ended the second call, and as I was sitting there telling Bill, "I don't even know why I am trying.  I've tried 12 times already and it didn't work."  Viola!  My library is back!  I am so happy!!

I am just sad that the BNTSA left a sour taste in my mouth re: the Nook.  I will still talk it up to friends but I will no longer mention the lend me feature.  That and their customer service is crap.

He is such a smart little boy.  He mimics everything we do.  Especially Stewart.  He loves to shadow Stewart and do everything he does.  This include running around making shooting noises, making dinosaur noises, making train noises, making car noises, playing Nerf, running around the "lap" in our house, looking at books, sitting quietly and watching TV, eating, playing the DS, swimming . . . I could go on forever.

I am sitting here on the bed, I have the laptop out and Parker is sitting next to me with Stewart's DSi.  He likes to sit around with it and sometimes he takes some pictures.  He mostly likes to get out the stylus and move it around - he thinks he is doing stuff.  It's pretty cute.  But I just glanced over at him and he is actually playing one of the New Super Mario Brothers mini games.  It's the one where you roll a snowball down a road, trying to avoid the obstacles.  I glance over at him, and he has the stylus gripped in his sweaty little hand and he is moving the stylus up and down on the screen making the snowball roll.  So as I sit here in amazement, I see that he is navigating the menus.  HE IS TWO YEARS OLD!  When the game is over, he gets it back to the main menu and selects a new game.  I've just watched him start a game, couldn't figure out how to play it, so he pulled up the "continue" or "quit" menu and he selected quit and it went back to the main menu and he chose another game.  I'm not even kidding.  I am totally amazed.  I know he can't read - but he is remembering what happens when he does a certain action.  He's going through and playing the mini games I'm just sitting here shaking my head in amazement. 

We have been spending a lot of time in an inflatable pool that we set up on the deck.  it's a decent sized pool - and it's fun for the three of us to climb in and play around.  Stewart likes to get underwater and "swim a lap."  Yesterday I noticed Parker doing the same thing.  Two years old, never had swimming lessons and he crawls his little body back and forth, HOLDING HIS BREATH, with his head under water.  This he learned from watching Stewart!  I think Stewart likes seeing that Parker copies him - and it helps when I try to stress that Stewart needs to set a good example for his brother.

Parker is this amazing little sponge.  I know I learned about this in class but to me, a theory is just a theory when it's black and white on paper.  But now that I see it - I 100% believe in the social learning theory.  Just look at the amazing things that Parker is doing!

It is a great summer so far!  I am having so much fun spending time with the kids.  We are keeping up with Stewart's studies and reading books on a regular basis.  So even with all the fun, we are still being productive.  :)  It is good to be me!

It is officially the first day of summer.  Even though we are only a mere eight minutes into the shiny happy new season, it is already fully hot.  Last year we prided ourselves on making it to July before we turned on the AC.  Last summer must have been more mild - I caved and cranked it on a few weeks ago.  Bill and I could handle the heat - but I couldn't handle seeing the kids hot and sweaty and miserable.  They didn't complain but they just looked so hot.  Last summer was different, too.  I was working.  So no one was home all day, when it's the most hot.  We would get home around 6, just as it was starting to cool down.  Last year, once I did finally turn on the AC, we kept it at 78.  So far, I'm down to 75 this summer.  And some nights, when I am extra hot and miserable, and my cold shower didn't work its magic, I will turn it down to 72.  I know.  For SHAME!!!  I may be doing a completely different dance when the electric bill comes in this month.  In the mean time, I am basking in my comfortableness!

I just discovered Jen Lancaster's books.  She has published five "memoirs."  Jen Lancaster rocks on so many levels.  I find it completely AMAZING that she is only 40 and has had such a life that she was able to write FIVE (that's 1, 2, 3, 4+1,  FIVE) memoirs.  I can barely find things to blog about, and I gave up long ago on trying to blog about interesting things.  I started with "Bitter is the New Black."  I felt like I could relate to her situation.  She was fired by a woman named Kathleen.  My boss was named Kathleen.  She was told she was a rockstar.  I was told I was a rockstar.  Two days later she was fired.  ME TOO!  Oh, and I forgot to mention the FULL title of her memoir:  "Bitter Is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smart-Ass, or Why You Should Never Carry a Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office."  Could somebody please tell me how you could see a book with this title and NOT read it!?  Anyway, she is a good writer.  It feels very candid.  She just seems so real.  She doesn't step up on her high horse and try to make herself out to be anything she isn't.  I've read a lot of memoirs where it is painfully obvious that the author thinks she is high and mighty and isn't afraid to talk herself up.  Her books are just different.  I don't really know how I know that - but just read her book.  Why would you portray yourself as sooo "condescending, egomaniacal, self-centered" and judgemental, if you aren't actually like that!?

I enjoyed "Bitter is the New Black" so much, I moved on to one of her other memoirs, "Pretty in Plaid: A Life, a Witch, and a Wardrobe, or, The Wonder Years before the Condescending, Egomanical, Self-Centered Smart-Ass Phase"  I think it is considered the prequal to "Bitter" even though it was the fourth one published.  "Pretty in Plaid" was also awesome so I moved on to another one, "Such a Pretty Fat: One Narcissist's Quest to Discover If Her Life Makes Her Ass Look Big, or Why Pie Is Not the Answer".  For some reason, Barnes and Noble doesn't have this available as an ebook.  So I went native, and bought a paperback book.  I am about 2/3 of the way into the book.  It feels so retro to hold a book and have to turn the pages. I will read her other two memoirs because with every page, I find another reason why I think this author is so refreshing.  For example:  in one book ("Such a Pretty Fat") she has referenced (among other things) Cher Horowitz from "Clueless," Sex and the City, and she gave a kickass recipe for mashed potatoes!  Reading her book feels more like a conversation with a friend than reading someone's memoir.  I think this is the first book where I have wanted to read it with a highlighter in hand so I can highlight all of the ridiculously laugh out loud funny things she writes.  I have lost count how many times I have thought to myself, "OMG!  I totally know what she means!" or "OMG, I have totally wanted to say that to someone!"

So you should go now and pick up at least one of her books.  If you have a Nook, I can lend them to you (!) but Holly is first on the list.  :)

Next topic -  why my ass is blogging at 12:30am.  Yeah, I can't seem to go to sleep at a decent hour anymore.  The other day I blamed it on caffeine.  I had half a Dr Pepper at 1:00pm.  When I was still awake at 1:00am, I was cursing the Doctor and wishing I had just had some water.  But then I was up late again the next day - and again today.  What gives?!  I don't want to be up this late.  I would love to be asleep and snoring like Bill, Stewart, and/or Parker.  All are wrapped up and cozy in their beds (blankets are no longer optional because the AC IS ON!!!  YAY!) I should be enjoying the only time that I get to myself - but there is one big fat greasy problem.  Bill is going to wake up at 7:00am, Stewart is usually awake before Bill gets up, and Parker will wake up when he hears daddy going down the stairs.  So here I am, blogging when I know that I will be awake in about 6 hours.  What's worse than just being awake?  I will be parenting!  You know how some medication says "don't operate heavy machinery while taking this medicine"?  I should come with a warning label as well, printed up on a pillow case that is NO LESS than 500 thread count (because really, I go to bed to be comfortable.  Not to be itchy and poked by cheap crunchy low threadcount sheets.)  It should read:  "Do not engage in the act of parenting if she has not had at least eight hours of UNDISTURBED beauty sleep."  UNDISTURBED is the key word.  It may or may not be so relevant anymore.  KNOCK ON WOOD.  Parker has slept through the night the last 3 nights.  He seems to be doing really well at night - and we are finally getting a full night's rest.  Saying it is probably going to be like the time I told Bill, "my family has a history of flat tires."  We were driving from OKC to Columbus, OH.  No less than twenty minutes later, we were pulled over, unpacking the trunk becuase we had a flat tire.  Not even joking.  Needless to say, some things don't get said - they are silently acknowledged.  I should probably go back and delete "Parker has slept through the night the last 3 nights" but he should get credit for being a good sleeper.

I could blog on and on and on - and perhaps I will find the time to come back and visit some topics that I have been mentally blogging.  Let me make up a list so I don't forget (FYI: a list is CLASSIC TRACEY!)

• our trip to Lewes, DE and Cajun Fest at Breaux (to include how I won tickets and finding Bill chatting up a very tall Asian woman at the wine tasting tent. . . )
• My first summer of no work since I was 14. 
  

I should really carry around a little note book and write things down.  I always think of things I want to blog about and then I forget!  My mind is turning into mush!

Good night.  Good Morning.  Please let the kids sleep in until at least 7:30.  It is such a weak and pathetic request.  I remember when I used to sleep in until 11:00 am.  At what age will my kids learn the value of sleeping in!?  I hope it is soon!

"Nighty night Shakespeare."  (One of my favorite Doctor Who lines.  Yes, I am that sci-fi nerd.  But I only like the new Doctor Who - hopefully that makes me a little less of a nerd!)

P.S.  I should have never commented on Parker's awesome sleeping.  As soon as I drifted off to sleep, he woke up fussing.